she's had family with shields
(and an ex-husband, too)
so i asked sam if i
should be a cop.
"no," she said.
"you have too much optimism
and it coexists in that brain of yours with
so much anger.
and watching that anger suffocate
the optimism would be like seeing you
throwing a piece of yourself
to the wolves.
because people do horrible things.
and they'd treat you so badly
when you were
just trying to help. (obviously people
would get pissed at you if they got
a ticket or something) but that's not
what i'm saying.
people you'd really be trying to help
would resent you. and i think you'd
be a good cop. and a good cop. but
you'd have to let
a big part of you die to do it.
so please don't."
"that's okay," i said. "i don't know
if i could pass the fitness tests,
but with a week or two of training
i bet i could.
i bet i could save you.